What I Actually Use
Flights, tours, gay-friendly hotels, train passes, LGBTQ+ group travel, insurance, eSIM connectivity, and gear — organized by category. Some of these are affiliate links, meaning I earn a small commission if you book through them. The recommendations are real. I would not send you somewhere bad.
Book Tours & Tickets
Skip-the-line access, guided tours, and timed-entry tickets. GetYourGuide is my go-to for Europe and international travel; Viator is better for US domestic. Both cover most of the same destinations.
Sagrada Família, Barcelona
Tower access sells out weeks in advance. Book skip-the-line tickets early, especially for the summer and fall. One of the few tourist experiences that actually lives up to the hype.
Book ticketsAuschwitz-Birkenau, Poland
Timed entry is now mandatory. A guided tour that includes transport from Krakow is the most straightforward way to go, and the context a good guide adds is worth it. Book weeks ahead.
Book guided tourColosseum, Rome
The line without a ticket is genuinely brutal in peak season. Skip-the-line access plus a guide who knows the history makes this a completely different experience than showing up and hoping.
Skip the linePrague Jewish Quarter
Josefov is one of the best-preserved Jewish quarters in Europe. A guided tour through the Old Jewish Cemetery and synagogues adds depth you will not get from a self-guided walk.
Book guided tourAlcatraz, San Francisco
Tickets sell out weeks in advance — this is not an exaggeration. Book early. The audio tour narrated by former guards and inmates is genuinely excellent.
Book ferry ticketsMount Rainier, Washington
A guided tour is the best way to experience the park if you are not a serious hiker. The wildflower meadows in summer are something else entirely. Well worth the drive from Seattle.
Book guided tourFind Flights
I use Skyscanner for most flight searches — it surfaces budget carriers that Google Flights misses, and the calendar view makes finding cheap windows easy. WayAway is worth running alongside it for long-haul routes because it pays cashback on top of the booking price, which adds up quickly on transatlantic fares.
Compare All Flights
Searches every airline and booking site simultaneously, including budget carriers that do not appear on other aggregators. The “whole month” view is the most useful way to find the cheapest travel window if your dates are flexible. Set a price alert on any route and it emails you when fares drop.
Search flightsFlights With Cashback
Books through major airlines and OTAs but pays cashback after travel. The premium membership ($49.99/year) meaningfully increases the cashback rate. Worth checking any long-haul booking where the dollar amount is high enough that 5–10% back actually registers as real money.
Search and earn cashbackTransatlantic to Europe
Flying into Madrid, Barcelona, or Rome from the US East Coast? Skyscanner surfaces transatlantic deals on Norwegian, Iberia, Level, and others that are often $200–400 cheaper than the major carriers. Flying into a secondary hub (Valencia instead of Barcelona, Bologna instead of Rome) sometimes cuts the fare in half.
Set a price alertBook Hotels
I book through Booking.com for most trips. The LGBTQ+-friendly filter is genuinely useful for finding properties that are more than just tolerant — places that actively welcome queer guests. All of the properties below I can personally vouch for.
Palm Springs LGBTQ+ Resorts
Palm Springs has a remarkable concentration of gay-owned and gay-friendly resorts, most with pools that are genuinely social. Use the LGBTQ+-friendly filter and sort by guest rating for the best options.
Browse resortsHotel Cortezo, Madrid
A 4-star hotel in the historic center, a 5-minute walk from Puerta del Sol and close to the Lavapiés and La Latina neighborhoods. Well-located, comfortable, and reasonably priced for Madrid.
Check availabilityChicago, River North
River North puts you walking distance from Boystown, the Magnificent Mile, and most things worth doing in Chicago. Good hotel value in a city where location matters a lot for how much you end up in cabs.
Browse hotelsLGBTQ+ Travel
Services and operators built specifically for queer travelers — not just tolerant, but designed for us. misterb&b for accommodation, VACAYA for cruises and group trips, and Out Adventures for small-group adventure travel. These are different categories from the general booking tools above and worth knowing about.
Gay-Friendly Stays
An Airbnb alternative where every host has specifically opted in as LGBTQ+-welcoming. Particularly useful in cities where mainstream hotel options feel lukewarm, or in neighborhoods where staying with a local host adds to the experience. Strong inventory in Barcelona, Madrid, Paris, Berlin, and Mexico City.
Browse gay-friendly staysLGBTQ+ Cruises & Resorts
VACAYA runs fully chartered LGBTQ+ cruises and resort takeovers — the entire ship or property is queer travelers. Fundamentally different from booking a cabin on a mainstream cruise and hoping for the best. Destinations include the Caribbean, Mediterranean, Alaska, and Mexico. Bear-friendly programming on select sailings.
Browse VACAYA tripsLGBTQ+ Group Tours
Small-group adventure travel built for queer travelers. Strong Africa and Latin America programs: primate tracking in Rwanda, hiking in Patagonia, cultural immersion in Morocco. The group model means you are not navigating a sensitive destination solo and wondering about the vibe of your guide or fellow passengers.
Browse group toursTrain Travel
I am a genuine advocate for train travel. It is slower, more comfortable, and more interesting than flying. Trainline covers both Amtrak routes and European rail — one place to book both. The routes below are ones I have done and can fully endorse.
Empire Builder
Chicago to Seattle (or Portland) via the northern Rockies and Glacier National Park. 46 hours. The scenery through Montana is the most dramatic train journey in the US. Book a roomette if you can — it is worth it.
Book the Empire BuilderCoast Starlight
Seattle to Los Angeles along the Pacific Coast. The stretch through the Cascades and Northern California is stunning. The dining car is a genuine social experience. One of the best long-distance trains in the country.
Book the Coast StarlightSunset Limited
Los Angeles to New Orleans through Palm Springs, Tucson, El Paso, San Antonio, and Houston. Three days across the American Southwest. The only train route that goes through all of that geography.
Book the Sunset LimitedEurail Global Pass
If you are doing more than three or four separate train journeys across multiple European countries, a Eurail pass pencils out. Covers Spain, France, Italy, Germany, Austria, Czech Republic, and 33 other countries. Book seat reservations separately on high-speed routes like the AVE in Spain — the pass covers the fare, not the reservation fee.
Check Eurail passesTravel Insurance
World Nomads is what I use. They cover adventure activities (hiking, wildlife tracking, water sports) that most standard travel policies exclude, and their claims process is straightforward. Important for any trip that involves wildlife, rough terrain, or destinations with limited medical infrastructure.
Adventure Travel Coverage
Covers trip cancellation, emergency medical evacuation, gear theft, and adventure activities up to a high risk tier. Particularly important for primate tracking in Africa, hiking in remote areas, or any trip involving expensive gear.
Get a quoteLong-Distance Train Trips
Covers trip interruption, missed connections, and delays on long-haul rail journeys. If your Empire Builder is 10 hours late (it happens), having coverage for a hotel night in Havre, Montana is good to have.
Get a quoteInternational Travel
For Europe and Central America, particularly valuable for emergency medical. European countries have reciprocal healthcare agreements that help EU residents but do nothing for US travelers. Do not skip insurance in Rwanda or any country with limited medical facilities.
Get a quoteSubscription Travel Insurance
A subscription model ($45/4 weeks) that renews continuously as long as you are traveling. Better value than World Nomads for anyone doing multiple trips in a year or traveling for extended stretches. Covers emergency medical, hospitalization, and COVID. Does not cover adventure sports above a basic threshold — stack with World Nomads for trips involving wildlife tracking or serious hiking.
Get SafetyWingTravel Gear
Not a comprehensive packing list. Just the things that have earned permanent spots in the bag and would cause genuine distress if lost. These are Amazon affiliate links.
Packing Cubes
The organization benefit is real. One cube per category (tops, bottoms, electronics) means you never unpack the whole bag to find something at the bottom. The compression versions are particularly good for longer trips.
Shop packing cubesUniversal Travel Adapter
The one with multiple USB ports and universal plug coverage. Europe, UK, and Africa all use different sockets. A single adapter that handles all three plus USB-C charging is worth more than you realize at 11pm in a foreign hotel.
Shop adaptersPackable Daypack
A bag that compresses to nothing and unpacks to a useful 20L daypack. Indispensable for day trips from a base hotel. The ones with a hidden zipper pocket for passport and cash are worth the small premium.
Shop daypacksRFID-Blocking Wallet
A slim card wallet with RFID blocking. Pickpockets in Barcelona, Rome, and the Paris Metro increasingly use RFID scanners on crowded transit. A slim bifold with blocking built in costs $15–25 and eliminates the risk entirely. Get one before Europe, not after.
Shop RFID walletsConnectivity & Privacy
An eSIM removes the roaming bill and the airport SIM-card hunt. A VPN matters more than most people realize in destinations where digital privacy is not a given — and for LGBTQ+ travelers visiting countries with hostile legal climates, it is not optional. Both are worth having before you board.
eSIM for Europe
Buy a regional Europe eSIM before you leave home. It activates the moment you land, no physical SIM required. A 10GB EU plan typically runs $20–25 and covers Spain, France, Italy, Germany, and 30+ other countries on a single plan. Works on any unlocked phone purchased in the last four years.
Get an Airalo eSIMeSIM for Africa & the Caribbean
Rwanda, Saint Martin, and Mexico all have Airalo coverage. Local SIM cards in Rwanda require registration with a national ID, which is slow for short-stay visitors. An eSIM sidesteps that entirely. Caribbean coverage is useful for island-hopping trips where you move between territories with different carriers.
Get an Airalo eSIMVPN for LGBTQ+ Travelers
In destinations where same-sex activity is criminalized or monitored, a VPN is not paranoia — it is practical. I have used Private Internet Access since January 2016 — it runs on phones, tablets, and laptops simultaneously, has a verified no-logs policy, and is consistently one of the fastest options at its price point. Worth having active any time you are on hotel or hostel WiFi, and non-negotiable before traveling anywhere with hostile LGBTQ+ legal climates.
Get Private Internet AccessOn My List
Things I didn’t get to on each trip but fully intend to. Sorted by destination — filter by trip above to see only the wishlist for a place you’re planning.
Casa Batlló
Gaüdí’s most theatrical building and probably the most spectacular interior in Barcelona. Skip-the-line is non-negotiable in summer. I walked past it three times. Next trip I’m going inside.
Book skip-the-lineToledo Day Trip
An hour from Madrid by train, Toledo packs medieval architecture, El Greco, and a genuinely intact old city into half a day. I kept running out of time in Madrid proper. This is the first thing I add on the next Spain trip.
Book guided day tripFlamenco Show
I ate at a tablao and skipped the show. That was a mistake. A proper flamenco performance in a small Madrid venue — not the tourist dinner theater version — is one of those things worth booking in advance.
Book a showChicago Architecture River Cruise
I walked the Loop and saw the skyline from the lakefront. What I didn’t do was the river cruise with a guide who can actually explain what you’re looking at — consistently one of the highest-rated tours in the city, and I have no excuse for missing it.
Book the cruiseSwamp & Bayou Tour
I ate well and stayed up too late. I did not get out to the bayou. This is a real miss — the swamp ecosystem an hour outside the city is one of the genuinely unusual things about Louisiana, and guided boat tours run daily.
Book a swamp tourWillamette Valley Wine Tour
I passed through Portland and kept going. Oregon Pinot Noir from the Willamette Valley is legitimately world-class, and a half-day tour to 3–4 small producers outside the city is the kind of afternoon you build a whole trip around. Regret index: high.
Book a wine tourVatican Museums & Sistine Chapel
I had one day in Rome on the cruise and chose the Colosseum, Trevi, and Pantheon. The Vatican is an entirely separate half-day that I cut. Skip-the-line here is not optional — the queues are an hour-plus without it — and early-morning access before the crowds is worth booking months ahead.
Book Vatican accessAmalfi Coast Day Trip
We docked in the general vicinity and I never made it to Positano or the Amalfi drive. This is one of those landscapes that looks fake in photos and apparently looks more fake in person. Day trip by boat from Naples or Sorrento, or a guided drive along the coast road.
Book a day tripCinque Terre Hiking & Boat Tour
Five villages on a Ligurian cliff face, connected by hiking trails. The classic route (Monterosso to Riomaggiore) is a half-day walk with a boat back. The cruise itinerary got close but not close enough. High on the next-Italy list.
Book Cinque TerreWieliczka Salt Mine
An underground world of chambers, chapels, and sculptures carved from salt — one of the oldest operating salt mines in the world and a UNESCO site since 1978. It is 20 minutes from Kraków, I was in Kraków for three days, and I never went. This is an embarrassing oversight I plan to correct.
Book the Salt MinePrague Castle
The largest ancient castle complex in the world, sitting above a city that looks like it was designed by someone who wanted to make painters cry. I spent my Prague time in the Jewish Quarter and Wenceslas Square. The Castle gets its own day next time.
Book a guided tourSachsenhausen Concentration Camp
35 minutes by train from central Berlin, Sachsenhausen was the model camp on which all subsequent Nazi camps were based. I covered the Holocaust Memorial and Topography of Terror in the city. Sachsenhausen is where the architecture of genocide was first designed and tested. It belongs on the same itinerary.
Book guided day tripNyungwe Forest Canopy Walk
A suspension bridge walkway through the forest canopy at Nyungwe National Park — one of the few places in Africa where you can do this. I tracked chimps in Nyungwe and ran out of time before getting to the canopy walk. It is 60 meters above the forest floor. Next time.
Plan a Rwanda tripGorilla Guardians Village
A cultural village run by former poachers who were trained as conservation guides — one of the more remarkable reintegration stories in ecotourism. Located near Volcanoes National Park. I drove past it. Should have stopped.
Add to your Rwanda tripMaho Beach
The beach immediately adjacent to Princess Juliana airport’s main runway — planes land close enough that you can read the fuselage. I saw it on the map every day and never made it. It is specifically the kind of absurd travel experience that is hard to explain to people who haven’t been.
Book a tourPinel Island Snorkel Tour
A tiny uninhabited island off the French side with clear shallow water, a reef, and sea turtles if you’re lucky. A short ferry or tour boat gets you there. I had a boat day and somehow missed it. Listed here as a standing commitment to myself.
Book a snorkel tourNo resources match those filters.
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